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24.3.18

My feeling about marriage.-- good genes and DNA

My feeling about marriage.

And a lot depends on good genes and DNA. I mean to say that perhaps some aspects of her traits might be hard --but DNA is stronger than picked up  traits. So if her DNA is good then you might overlook attitudes picked up from her environment.

This was obvious to me when I was very young. The issue might be race. After all, some races have a predominance of criminal DNA. It might have to do with faith. But in elementary school and high school, I realized that determining good genes from bad genes is not simple. There are not a lot of obvious signs.
This is why in Anglo Saxon countries an emphasis was placed on looking at the family of the prospective bride. But in high school, how could I tell who came from a good family? To to be honest, I looked at the only criteria that was available to me: good grades.

[Though I can not tell how much this had to do with whom I picked to hang out with. A lot of who my friends were seemed to depend more on who picked me. That was certainly the case with my first set of friends--the string quartet. They definitely picked me -not visa versa. I even remember the exact moment. We were on an orchestra tour in Vancouver. And the elite of the high school, the top brass-invited me to sit down with them. I still have no idea why. I was mediocre in grades, and also in playing the violin.

Later, the actual girl I did marry, in fact had a straight A average (and came from a very fine family), but our relationship in those days was with zero romantic interest. We were simply friends. Only after I disappeared off the horizon because I went to Yeshiva in NY, did her interest in me begin to take on a different kind of aspect.

The irony is that by that time I was not looking at genes or DNA, but whom was the Rosh Yeshiva's daughter [whom I did not get].  So I actually married someone that was very much along the lines of my original intention--good family and good DNA (thank God). That was in spite of the fact that at that time I was not looking at that at all.