w58 G Major

I might add besides the debt of gratitude I owe my parents introducing me to classical music, I have to mention Mr Smart in my high school whose love of music and contagious enthusiasm for great music definitely encouraged me. [I should add my thanks to my friends in  high school with which we had a string quartet that met every week that also helped me develop my intuition for music. i.e.  Wendy Wilson [not the famous one but one who later became a lawyer in Michigan], Roland Hutchingson, Paula Finn.]

[Here is a link to a piece that I wrote in those days

Wolfgang Wodarg, a German lung doctor on virus.

interesting doctor that has some knowledge about viruses, not speculation.

To repent is always a good idea. The best idea is to find books on the subject from the Middle Ages before the concepts of faith and repentance got watered down during the Renaissance. Many ideas of the Renaissance are important, but do not take the place that the Middle Ages had on the importance of Faith with Reason. (That was the unique contribution of the Middle Ages.)

The issue is really like that of Hegel that there is a kind of dialectical process going on in history in which truth gets steadily clarified. [So even though the Renaissance was an improvement on many things from the Middle Ages, still that does not mean to throw out teh good that was unique to the Medieval period.]

I thought about repentance for some time while I was in Uman and came up with the idea that surely most of my mistakes I am unaware of. Just learning the Gates of Repentance  and other books of Musar of the Middle Ages and Rav Israel Salanter is a help but there can be even after learning Musar many issue that remain unclear. So it occurred to me that at least some of my mistakes I am aware of. I can tell by subsequent events and stemmed directly. So the idea I got was to repent on at least what I know I did wrong. Then with help from above hopefully I might be able to get further. This seemed certainly an advantage to just picking out of  a hat what happens to occur to me what repentance might be.    

The idea of saying the words and going on has a lot to do with trust in God.  It is mentioned in Rav Nahman but goes back all the way to the Gemara itself and brought in the classical medieval  Musar book אורחות צדיקים Ways of the Righteous.

To me it seems like a way to learn not just Gemara but also Physics--but again only with trusting God that you do a small amount if effort and then God sends the blessing.

[But then you also need faith that such a path of learning is in itself worthy and needed. This was definitely the way of books of Musar based on Saadia Gaon. חובות לבבות for example. [Obligations of the Hearts.] However this was an argument in Musar itself. Certainly the disciples of Rav Israel Salanter saw no value and even negative value in any secular studies. I would myself make a distinction between exactly what type of secular studies we would be talking about. Any subject in a University which has the name "studies" attached to it is clearly pseudo science.

nice video about viruses being manufactured in labs.

People can get psyched up about anything.The Japanese had shown their preference for death rather than surrender already as early as 1942. At first it startled American generals at Saipan until they started seeing that it was no isolated phenomenon, but repeated itself island after island the closer they got to Japan's Islands--not just their conquered territory. This was not Japanese soldiers. It was not even Japanese civilians women and children that threw themselves off cliffs rather than be caught by Americans. That is how much the Japanese soldiers had psyched them up.

So it is in one's interest to have an accurate idea of the "big picture" aka reality.

It is no mystery if a lot of people believe stuff which to you seems ridiculous. That is just the regular ability of humans and other animals to convince themselves of anything. Take pigeons for another example. No other  species is quite as superstitious. Have them step on a bell before they get food a couple of times. They will believe even against all later evidence that that ringing bells is what causes the food to come. And they will not stop stamping on that bell no matter how much or how long it takes--even if never. 

Trust in God. "Bitachon"

There is no algorithm for when one should make effort to get his needs and when one should sit back and trust in the Divine decree. But the closest I  ever got to some kind of resolution about this was Rav Nahman of Breslov in the LeM vol II. Chapter 4. that one should make  a vessel in which the blessing can flow into.

Even in open miracles in the Bible there is always some physical action attached in the same way. Some action by which the blessing can come into the world. E.g. Elisha the prophet telling Neeman the Syrian general to immerse himself in the Jordan seven times in order to be cured.

[I have to add that the only time that trust in God was a real possibility for me in terms of restraint from action was at the Mir in NY for the short time I was there as a student and married. It seems to me the fact that the general atmosphere was such that trust in God was a possibility. A kind of group dynamics. When everyone else was trusting in God, it made it a greater reality for me. And in fact it worked. The more I ceased from action and chose to sit and learn Torah and trusted that God would do everything for me that I needed, the more it happened just like that.